


Closer to Her

by kijun



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Dating, F/M, Years Later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-10-18 12:47:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20639405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kijun/pseuds/kijun
Summary: Dating the ex-prosecutor that originally got him into jail while also bailing him out felt pretty weird at the start.But it feels weirder when he can't stop wanting to be even more closer to her.





	Closer to Her

"Ren."

The college boy woke up from his daze. His eyes meeting a pair of beautifully red others that gazed him with hints of worry. He had wait a few seconds before realizing he'd lost himself in his thoughts again.

"Sorry." He almost stammered, almost losing his usual cool persona. "You were talking about Makoto, yes?"

The silver haired lawyer didn't seem to follow his attempt on continuing the topic. "You've been losing your focus these days."

Things weren't like this. They weren't like this before. Yes, of course. A relationship between the infamous leader of the Phantom Thieves and the ex-prosecutor who was in charge of their case would be too astonishing to sound real. Even as a thought. But it was always what he had wanted. From the moment his eyes laid their sights on her beautiful, slender and tall appearance. To when she interrogated him with such roughness in her tone, or even when she starts speaking softly when noticing the drug's effects on him. Her voice always found its way from his ears to his insides. It was as if she was the one that started the clockwork in his body, her entire existence its engine. Ren couldn't help but to fall for the older Niijima.

But he hadn't expected his feelings to be reciprocated. He thanked every God in this universe, even that God that he defeated all those years ago -if it even counted as one - for that moment of her slip-up. He thanked the Gods he was sober enough to hear her confess in the midst of that crowded bar. He thanked the Gods that she kissed him before he could stutter and end up messing the whole thing. Though she passed out afterwards.

Thinking back about that time, she can be so cute when she's drunk. Or is it rude to think of that of an older woman?

Either way, it's been over a year hasn't it?

"Ren." 

He loved hearing his name roll off her tongue like that. It used to be a challenge for her to say, even with honorifics. But she kept trying. Wanting to show him how much he means to her. Wanting to show others how much he means to her.

"Sae."

He also loved seeing her reaction whenever he says her name back. Loved seeing how offguard she gets when he says it without any hesitation, as though he'd been rehearsing the word in his spare time. The first time he said it in front of her, she was so taken aback that he got to see a rare shade of pink painted over her cheeks. What a sight it was. If it weren't for his lack of artistic talent, he'd paint her like that and would brag about it to Yusuke. He knows if he did though, she wouldn't like that.

Yes, he loved how cute she can be at times. Even if they were things that came once in a blue moon.

Her brows furrowed. "Is something bothering you? You keep staring into space with that look of yours."

"I'm just thinking how lucky I am to have you in my life."

A pause. Sae looks at him, briefly, before smiling warmly. "Well, you'd be dead without me." She jests.

Ren chuckles. "It's amazing how such a hardworking workaholic has time to crack jokes."

"It's fascinating how such a diligent law student has time to daydream so much." 

They continued to enjoy each other's presence. They enjoyed making each other smile effortlessly. In that little apartment that Ren owns, they showered each other with laughs and heartwarming feelings.

He wanted things to stay like this. He wanted to stay with her, never leave her, never have her leave him. Never drift away from her. He wanted to stay close, so he would be sure that she wouldn't let go. Going back to his past, he didn't want to be alone anymore. He hated being alone. That's why everyone meant so much to him. How she meant so much to him.

He didn't want things to go back to ground zero.

But an itching ant in his mind kept pinching him with the question.

Can they get any closer, then?

The world suddenly seemed a little darker. He came back to reality realizing that she had cut the distance between them in half. The lamp stand being the only lightsource that had been turned on in the room was now unseen behind Sae. Their proximity so close Ren could feel her calm, hot breath. It made him a little bit embarrassed to realize she could probably feel his own hitch.

"Amamiya." She said, looking a little mad.

He gulps. She always used his last name when something's bothering her. "Yes?"

"Tell me what's wrong." Her voice building itself stiff, it reminded him during their interrogation days. Hours actually. "Theres something more to what you said isn't there?"

She was smart. There was no question to it. So, of course he should have expected her to catch on. the only fool in this room was him.

But the reason why he couldn't tell her in the first place stood strong. "It's nothing you should be concerned about." He puts on one of his eye-melting smiles that would strike arrows into girls' hearts. A thought of him using the curve of his lips instead of Arsene during his phantom days was quite a random something. Especially in this situation. Though he wondered if it'd actually work.

He places a hand over her cheek. "I promise you."

There was another pause. A pause long enough that made Ren think he was able to change the subject. But it was also shortlived when she ended up taking his hand into her arms and sighing.

Before he can ask what's wrong though, he found her lips glueing themselves onto his own. Her eyes were closed, and she pushed him down against the couch. His wrist still cuffed by her, and her body atop him now, he couldn't register the scene fast enough to react yet. It was only when she started using her tongue that he felt a spike in his body.

She pulled back, her chest going up and down and a drop of their mixed saliva created a thin bridge between the two's mouths. Sae's eyes were open now, and locked on to his own. Not even waiting for him to say anything before she starts talking with that firm tone of hers. Albeit now, it sounded more breathy, and more_ hotter._

"I take it that I'll have to force it out of you then?" She boldly says.

God, was the sight of her atop of him, breathing heavily with her cheeks slightly flushed and the sound of her threatening him through the acts of innapropriate actions something to die for. It was something the teenage him would wished to happen, yet knew could not. Yet here they are. 

As much as he loved this, Ren knew he had to stop it before things escalate the wrong way.

"Sae," He looks up to her, thanking God that she was on his chest. He felt embarrassed, but even moreso that he'll have to confess it. "You're... Gonna fuel my daydreaming even more."

He said it.

He said it and now wants to run the hell away.

He was so embarrassed that he just had to look away whilst using his free hand to cover his face. Feeling not just the cloth of the black sweater he'd been wearing all these years brush against his nose, but the intense heat on his cheeks flaring like a flame.

Even if he runs away, he knows he'll come running back. Knowing himself enough to know that he wouldn't last so long without his Sae.

There was no response. The third pause of their night. This one awfully killing him from the inside out. Maybe he should've been more weary of what she was saying. Maybe he should've listened more to her. If he did, he'd have avoided this situation. This, this dreadful situation.

Suddenly, he felt her grip on his right wrist disappear, and his arm being pulled away from his face. Still too scared to look up, he continued to look at the two empy glasses of coffee that sat on the coffee table. He hoped it was dark enough for the color on his cheeks to be hidden.

He hadn't expected her to plant a soft kiss on his cheeks instead though.

"Sae?" He finally looks up to her when she pulled back, though just a little bit.

"..It's unbelievable, really."

He pondered what she could ever mean. But that soft gaze she gave to him was enough to fill his heart with the immense urge to cherish it.

"How many times you surprise me. It's unbelievable."

Hearing that, he can't help but smirk proudly. "I was hoping you'd say how much you love me."

She smiles at his antics. "I'd rather show that."

Again, with her boldness. He loved this woman so much, yet he trembles at how dangerous she is.

"Sae, I-"

"You're not going to hurt me."

Sae leans into the sides of his neck, kissing them with some gentle bites here and there. She brings herself to his ear, letting him feel her hot breath as she talks. "I trust you." 

Just feeling her breath made him shudder. It didn't help when she licked his lobes. A little more of this, and he'd lose control for sure. As much as he wanted _her_, the thought of not knowing what will happen next was still scary.

She felt his hesitance, and brought her eyes back to his. 

"Isn't this what you want?"

It is. It really, really is.

How many nights of him painfully resisting awkward thoughts of her. How many nights of him hugging his pillow, wishing it was her. How many nights of him waking up with the consequences of his dirty dreams. How many nights of him hitting himself with guilt. 

He loved her. But the thought of hurting her was a fear that could possibly be a phobia of his. He wouldn't know what to do if one day she stood up, yelled at him and never wished to talk to him again. It'd be even worst if she just one day disappeared, never to be even seen in his life. He didn't want that. He didn't want to force himself on her. He didn't want to make her do things that would be favoring him. He wanted her to be happy.

Oh.

That's right.

That's what he wanted.

Ren wrapped his hands around her waist. Keeping her in his grasp, yet so softly it felt like a blanket to her. He looked at her, a warm and also genuine smile coming forth.

"I just want to be the one who makes you the happiest you can be."

How dumbfounded she was. It almost made him chuckle.

"I don't want to make you do things that are because of me only. I want us to be able to want things together."

He hugged her tighter, holding her head down next to his so she doesn't have to keep lifting it. "I want to cherish you too much that I can't be selfish."

The fourth, and final silence they had that night. A silence that let the air of the AC run a tune for them. A soft whisper that sang them a song of congratulations, yet also its cool temperature giving more reasons to cuddle. Ren didn't say anything more. Sae was speechless. But they both stayed together. His hands locking her up in a comforting blanket, and her body still pressed against his chest. They were each other's warmth. It was when Ren brought his hand on her hair that she flinched. He brought his hand down, grazing softly over a strand of her hair, and when he reached the end, he took just a small gather of the silver silk and patted his lips with it. 

They didn't need to share anymore words. They stayed like that, cuddled together on the couch. Ren in his comfortable pajamas, while Sae wore one of his shirts. They stayed comfortable. Letting the night pass as they were entrapted within each others's arms.

It felt like ages had passed before he felt certain that Sae fell asleep. He sighed to himself. A mixture of disappointment of the reality that they'll have to get up eventually, and relief that she felt comfortable enough to sleep on him. Either way, he realized this position wasn't gonna work. Wrapping hands around her back, he gets up as carefully as he can be. Avoiding a single movement that could possibly wake her up.

He sat her down on his futon, enclosing her body with the blanket so she wouldn't get cold. After making sure she was all safe from any disturbances, he felt proud. And let himself relish the sight before him.

Yes. He loved her. Not only is she cute, beautiful and smart, but she was everything to him. From her personality, to the way she beams when seeing him. Her long eyelashes that could be mistaken as artificial, or her legs making people want to drink more milk. Not to mention how kind, hard-working and endearing she is. Sae is literally the embodiment of "Too Good to be True".

And the fact that he's sitting next to her is a blessing itself.

"Thank you for loving me." 

Ren smiled, before he was about to get up and sleep on the couch. But before he could, he felt a tug on his shirt.

"You're impossible."

She pulled him into the futon with her. Embracing him from behind with the blankets, like a bird to her children. 

Ren smiles, before letting his eyelids close, and the world turning to the color black.

They slept together that night. And they both hoped that one day they'll be able to do this everynight.

**Author's Note:**

> i love sae


End file.
